Betrayal Of Trust

A few months ago, I began to notice that Lilly, my fourteen year-old lab mix, was losing muscle tissue in her hindquarters.  Just age, I figured, as she was still bouncy and happy to go for long walks.

About one month ago, she started to slip and fall, but only on hard floors with no traction, so I kept her nails trimmed close and it solved most of the problem.

About two weeks ago, she started to fall everywhere, and have an ever more difficult time getting up, while the muscles in her hindquarters continued to shrink.

I called the vet for an appointment last Monday.  While we were waiting, a bulge suddenly appeared on the bottom of her throat.  It happened literally overnight.

Last Monday she was diagnosed with the advance stages of Cushing's Disease.  The vet said she had little time left, but was not in any real pain, yet.

Over the last week, she fell as she squatted to urinate or defecate, she fell going down the two porch stairs, and trying to go back up.   Finally she could not get herself up any more, and simply stopped trying, so I have been lifting her until her hind legs were under her, and just carrying her up onto the porch, and then even up the one step into the house.

But she still looked at us with love, and when standing, still wagged her tail until it would make her lose balance and fall again.

Over the weekend she stopped eating, and lost control of her bladder.

So this afternoon we went back to the vet's office, to a small room in the back, with nice furniture for me and a soft padded cushion for her to lay on, and I held her head and talked softly to her as the nurse administered first the drug to make her sleep, then the one to stop her heart.

I came back home and picked up her beds, and her food & water dishes, including the one in my bedroom, put there so she would not have to walk far for her drinks. 

I caught myself as, after dumping the rest of her old water, I began to fill it again with fresh.